QOTD - April 30, 2010

Dragon Mood? -- like this

A quote that I've heard before and enjoyed:

Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't.

— Margaret Thatcher, served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, 1979-1990

Well said!

Two to the Fifth Birthday

Dragon Mood? -- happily remembering this momentous day!

Two to the fifth, that's how old my baby boy is today. Two squared is four, two cubed is eight, two to the fourth is 16 and two to the fifth is ... THIRTY-TWO!

Happy 32nd Birthday, Josh!

Adding to my book pile

Dragon Mood? -- excited

Taking myself out for a BIG adventure today, I went to the local used bookstore. It's a bookstore right out of a movie, long and narrow, bookshelves to the ceiling, books piled up everywhere. The lone person in the store, a slight, professorial-looking man, greeted me, my book list in hand.

"Do you have your books on a computerized list," I asked.

He replied by tapping the side of his head.

"Wow!" I sighed.

He took my list and turned on his heel. I followed behind. He led me from one book to the next, pulling them off packed shelves with surprising speed.

Here are my NEW used books:

• The Biography of Alice B. Toklas by Linda Simon
• Genius, The Life and Science of Richard Feynman by James Gleick
• A Walk in the Woods by Bill Bryson
• Amazing Grace, A Vocabulary of Faith by Kathleen Norris

And now, I have a confession to make.  As I write this post, copying Amazon links to the books, I suddenly realize that the Alice B. Toklas biography I bought is not the autobiography by Gertrude Stein.  Uh-oh!  That's what I thought I was buying.  Silly me.  Well, I suspect I'll still enjoy reading it.

And before diving into any of them, the one I'm most looking forward to is the Kathleen Norris book.

But first, I will finish The Known World by Leonard P. Jones.  I only started it a couple of nights ago and I still have most of the novel to read.  It's an interesting book about a black man who owned slaves in Virginia of the 1850s.  I am enjoying reading his prose.

Quiet Monday

Dragon Mood? -- reflecting on where I'm at

S and I had a good weekend. Sunday afternoon, she commented that she was dreading the work week. And while I listened, I thought to myself, though unemployed, there are things that make me dread this coming work week too.

My unemployment preoccupies my thoughts almost like someone's death, a shocking, unexpected event that echoes and reverberates still throughout almost everything I do. Even after ONE YEAR, I can hardly not think about it.

This preoccupation didn't happen overnight. I initially thought that if I simply did the responsible and necessary things, a job would come my way. I was prepared for it to be long and hard. I honestly didn't prepare myself to be unemployed for more than a year though.

If and when I'm not preoccupied, then I feel this dull numbness, like I'm only half alive. I hate to admit it, but I'm feeling this way more and more.

My confidence is sagging. Things I wouldn't have a given a second thought to nine months ago, now I find myself questioning, "Can you really do that?" If I see a position that sounds interesting with duties or responsibilities that are outside my experience, I find myself thinking, "Well, that eliminates me," or "They won't consider me now." It angers me that I'm thinking like this and yet I find myself doing it over and over again.

I catch myself wanting to whine, "All I want is a little job working on reports or spreadsheets." I think I'm feeling little, diminished, whittled down. Certainly the words, "worn down" fit. I feel utterly worn down by this unemployment.

Today, rather than being hard on myself, I gave myself permission to be gentle, to feel quiet, to feel worn down. After S left for work, I went back to bed and slept another two hours because I was tired. I sketched and drew for over an hour. I took a long hot shower, washed my hair and enjoyed the simple sensations of getting clean. I checked my email once today, but closed it up rather than checking hourly as I usually do.

This afternoon, I was a bit more productive. I paid some bills, went to an ATM and did some money transfers, bought a few groceries, put together some soup in the crock pot and went through mail. I gathered up recycling and put out the trash at curbside, ready for tomorrow morning.

All in all, a quiet Monday.

Relating to an infographic

Dragon Mood? -- intrigued

One of the advantages of Twitter is that I do run across a myriad of web resources that I otherwise would never encounter. Below is one example.

This is an infographic created by Jess Bachman, a freelance graphic designer. I'm rather intrigued by infographics, so I decided to incorporate it into my blog posting rather than simply link to it. His Flickr download was so illegible, I have linked to the Mint.com version.

As a person who's been in the job market for over a year, this is SUCH a relevant graphic! I think the points he makes about unemployment are apt and dead on. I see myself in that infographic.

Food Revolution

Dragon Mood? -- enthused -- sign up TODAY!

With childhood obesity and diabetes rates skyrocketing, join with Jamie Oliver and thousands of other concerned Americans to fight for our kids' health.

Sign up for Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution

QOTD - April 20, 2010

Dragon Mood? -- pondering

Poking around on a website devoted to typography, I found this quote in a beautiful calligraphy format.

"None of us knows what the next change is going to be, what unexpected opportunity is just around the corner, waiting a few months or a few years to change all the tenor of our lives."
— Kathleen Norris

Texas in springtime

Dragon Mood? -- tired by the trip, intoxicated by the beauty

We're just back from a trip to Texas. My dad would love his portion of the farm to look like 'Post Oak Savannah'. Here's one example of how beautiful it can be in the spring.

This photo was taken by Eric Pronske on Flickr.

Sticky gum

Dragon Mood? -- talking a good game of encouragement to myself

Have you ever stepped on a particularly sticky piece of gum and then simply been unable to get it off your shoe? That's the feeling of discouragement, inertia and almost depression I've been experiencing the past two weeks. I can't get rid of it!

Today I opened the Detroit Free Press website, the "Freep," and a small circle popped up asking if I'd take a survey. It was small enough and polite enough that I actually clicked on it. What to my surprise that this survey was created by a marketing firm that I had a phone interview with just two weeks ago. It was about printers of all things, the ones you have hooked up to your computer or laptop. Coincidence or what?

After completing the two or three minute survey, I realized the universe had just given me the message that I should NOT grieve acquiring that particular position. Though I REALLY want a job, how boring to write questions for marketing surveys on printers?!? Thanks, but no thanks.